Lose Yourself
by The-Caring-Misanthrope
Summary: Bro wasn't always able to provide everything for Dave. He wasn't always as cool and calm as he is now either. Over time and with Dave's help, he has been able to become the man that he is now. Just a little something that came to my mind while listening to some music.


So this was supposed to be a songfic, but since there are those trolls lurking around, I'm just posting it without the lyrics.

I highly suggest you listen to the song Lose Yourself by Enimen while you read this. Anyways, I hope you like it!

Disclaimer: I, of course, own nothing. I promise you that I don't. If I did, there would be way more Strider in Homestuck.

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_The young man slides his leather gloves onto his hands. He tries to calm his breath as he gazes into his mirror, fixing the __white polo he's decided to wear. Tonight is his first big gig, he can't afford to screw it up. Everything war riding on how well __he did tonight. His little bro's life depended on this.__Out to the living room he walks._

_ His brother was sitting on the ratty couch, reading some comic he had found earlier that __week. The elder walks over and sits beside him, looking over his small body. He reminds himself that he has to do good __tonight. He has to for his bro. __Young red eyes suddenly look upon the orange pair hiding behind pointy shades. As he sets his comic down, a soft smile __appears on his lips. The brothers share a soft hug, each with their own meanings. The younger wants to give his brother __the strength to do good tonight. He's trying to silently tell him that he knew he could. The elder wants to gain some __courage. He wants to be reminded of what is on the line tonight._

Tonight he doesn't even bother to check his appearance in the mirror. He has worn the same thing since the first gig. He pops his collar as he walks to the door of his room. He walks out and to the living room, straight over to the couch. His younger brother is there, surfing the TV channels. A silence settles between the two now. The younger brother only slides a little closer to the older brother that's taken a seat on the couch. No hugs were shared between the two now. Those had stopped many years ago. Now the two brothers sit, leaning on each other. No words as spoken, but the silence says it all. The younger still wishes his bro the best of luck, while the elder uses the younger as a way to calm himself.

It only last for a few minutes though before the elder readies himself to leave. When he stands, his hand ruffles the hair on his younger brother's head. Though their old traditions may have changed, new ones have appeared. A quiet good luck is mumbled from the younger before the elder smiles slightly and leaves.

_He keeps his face as stoic as he can while he walks to the DJ booth. His once white polo is already stained with the color of __random drinks that drunks had spilt. Though his face is calm, on the inside the man is a complete mess. So much was __riding on tonight. __Once at the booth, he begins to become even more nervous. Swear starts to cover his body in a thin layer as his knees __start to weaken. He lifts his suddenly heavy arms to the table. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. Behind his eyes __flash images of his lil'bro. His little Dave was depending on him. He couldn't screw this up._

Confidence fills the now slightly older male as he walks to the booth he started at so many years ago. His breathing comes easy and his body is as dry as it can be. He feels light as his arms rise to begin his job. His face is still as stoic as ever, though excitement and ease now fills his body. Not all of those things he felt so long ago.

_As the young blond begins, the crowd goes wild with excitement. Though soon it is lost amongst the joking. He has __screwed up a few times, but because of the mocking he misses a few more. After just a few songs, his time is up. __He walks off and collects his payment. The pitiful amount won't ever cover a Happy Meal for Dave. A soft sight escapes his __lips as he starts his walk home. He chocked. He had chocked. He had fucking chocked and it had cost him money that he __could've used for Dave. Anger consumes his body as these thoughts remained in his mind until he reaches their __apartment building._

He begins his gig at once. His leather covered hands move across the turntables effortlessly. The crowd hands on to his every move with rapt attention. He is what this crowd wants now. Song after song he plays, each earning him more money than he ever thought he could see. He gets his money once he is finished and drives back towards his home. Making a quick detour, he stops at a McD's and picks up some food for Dave and himself. A soft smile finds its way upon his lips as he takes a small bite of a fry.

_Once he reaches the apartment, he sits on the side of the couch not occupied by his brother. He sighs as he takes in just __how small the kid really is. He feels like he's even more of a failure. They've always been broke, they've always done __without, but the older Strider feels like such a fucking failure. __As he is about to get up, shut himself in his room, a small movement from the other side of the couch catches his __attention. Dave is stirring from his slumber, his bright, red eyes looking sleepily at him. Slowly, he moves closer to his __brother, laying his head on his shoulder. He smiles lightly as he begins to ask about how the night went. The elder slowly __puts his arm around the other's shoulders and starts to tell him about it, wanting some assurance that he isn't a shitty __brother._

He reaches the apartment a short time later, food in hand. His brother is laying in his normal spot on the couch, the same spot as the first night. Dirk sits on the other side of the couch, turning the tv on quietly. After a few moments of channel surfing and fry munching, Dave wakes slowly, shades slipping off his face. He blinks a few times before he realizes that there is food and his brother is waiting for him. The younger slowly moves over so his head leans against the elder's shoulder, just as he had so many years ago. Bother eat their food in silence as the gaze at the TV. Nothing good is on this time of the night, though they don't mind it. Talk fills the room soon after they are done eating. The talk is the same as it's always been, but shame is nowhere to be found in the elder.

_Again and again the man went to several gigs. He becomes more used to being in front of a crowd as time goes on. He __begins to get better, he begins to make more money, and best of all, he starts to feel less and less like a failure. Dave __begins to look healthier too. __Dave waits nightly for his older brother to arrive home. When his brother starts to become more popular, gifts are giver to __him nightly. Never was it anything big, but that never stopped the younger from being happy. He is proud to call Dirk his __older brother after all._

Dirk is the man now. No one ever doubts it. He is gone every night for a job. He's booked for months in advance, not a single night free. He now finds himself lost in his own music. No more does he have to worry about feeding his younger brother. No longer does he have to worry about keeping a roof over their heads. He has all that he needs.

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I hope you guys liked it! Some parts were an absolute pain to write... Tell me what you think please?!


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